Life gets busy and before you know it you are a playing many different roles – in my case: mother, wife, friend, daughter, sister, boss, employee, very average runner and more to varying degrees. As you get older the more you accrue – like scout badges, sewn onto my jumper! I felt myself getting heavier with the responsibility to be good at all of them, all of the time.
People talk about living in the moment but I seemed to be living between moments – feeling I had let people down in the one just gone and running behind the one about to happen. It’s not dissimilar to running a never ending downhill hurdle race, barely catching breath before you had to jump again.
It was clear to me that this couldn’t continue. It was exhausting plus I was never much of a hurdler! I had to choose a race that was mine and at least I stood a chance of winning.
“Something has to give; prioritise” is what I would hear from many quarters. What did that mean, from the list above what was least important? “Well what is it you actually want to do?” was another. Great question but sadly no answer.
All advice averaged out fell between stop doing things or buy yourself sometime and figure out what you want to do – that seemed more preferable but when was I going to do that? It felt like I had just got myself another scout badge – ‘idealist’ – where will I sew that?
I simply couldn’t accept that – it felt like a trade-off. Everyday life or personal fulfilment/happiness? I didn’t want to have two lives, I wanted to find fulfilment in everything I did.
That’s where this all started – 3 years later and I can honestly say I think I am there – not because I am sorted and found the answers but simply because I don’t need to be asked the questions anymore.
We are like Rubiks cubes, complicated. But life isn’t about getting the colours lined up in perfect sets of 9, it’s about understanding how it works. If you know your settings, your instruction manual, you can make what you want not just 6 perfect faces of conformity.
If I could do it, then it stands to reasons others could too – so Tasting Colours was born.
Founder of Tasting Colours